I Spy Beauty...

A (sometimes) weekly post about beauty seen, heard or discovered

I am awake again in the in-between. That time in the early hours between darkness and sunrise. That blurry-eyed time when we glimpse the hope of light, but have not yet thrown off the cover of darkness fully.

I have been here a lot lately. It is a tiring place to be. Being awake in the darkness is troubling. There are moments when it feels like it might never end, like the morning might never come. When you are tired from the struggle for rest and freedom, anything can feel endless, hopeless.

And yet, the light comes every day without fail. First, gradually. Slivers of light and shadow begin to ease the weight of darkness. It is an uncomfortable tension between despair and hope. Do we dare to hope for sunrise?

The in-between is a time of questions. The darkness has stripped away much of what we knew, giving us permission to ask. It is a time of wondering and wandering in the half-light.

And then with a blaze of glory, all of sudden it seems, we are overwhelmed by the shining light of the sun and the weight lifts. A new day. A new beginning. With the light of the sun comes a lightness of spirit, the feeling that we can try again. To live and love and not be overcome.

There's a moment when
Faith caves in
There's a time when every soul is certain God is gone

But every shadow is evidence of sun
And every tomorrow holds out hope for us
For every one of us
'Sunrise' Nichole Nordeman Copyright 2007

Good morning. And thank God for the sunrise.

I Spy Beauty...

A (sometimes) weekly post of beauty seen, heard or discovered

Some Sundays I can easily pinpoint a piece of beauty I wish to share with the world. Other Sundays, like today, I rack my brain trying to think of something valuable.

It is at the end of weeks like this one, when the weight of grief and anger and tiredness and change impede my ability to see, that it becomes even more important to play 'I Spy...'.

Today I am grateful for countless cups of tea in the autumnal Blue Mountains.

Today I am grateful for Skype and the technology that bridges the space and time between me and my dear sister-in-the-journey in Miami.

Today I am grateful for the chance to share Sunday morning breakfast with dear friends who I have shared life and home with, but have had to move away from this week.

Today I am grateful for mentors who cry with me and make me laugh so hard my stomach hurts.

Today I am grateful for the afternoon sun on the back stairs where I can read a good book.

Speaking of which, I am very grateful today for this quote from Nichole Nordeman's Love Story, reflecting on the creation story:

"Every brushstroke and lyric and clay pot and arabesque and sonnet. Any moment, no matter how small, that seeks to reflect the Creator must travel this lonely predawn road. The Spirit must hover and hover over our deep darkness. That is, if it is to be called good." (Love Story pg. 2)

I have spied beauty. But I so often forget that beauty is found wading through the mess and darkness.

This might be one meaning of the cliched line 'Beauty is in the eye of the beholder'....

To spy beauty I must have eyes to see.

What are you grateful for today? What beauty have you spied?

Words for Wednesday

From the song 'Real To Me' on the album Brave (2005)